Fit girls push harder
This morning, I am wresting with my head after a reality check about the intensity of my workouts – in particular strength training. Have I been too dependent on my trainers’ help and guidance, not dialing into my own body and ensuring that I can rock it on my own in the weight room or the gym?
This has been suggested by people close to me. The truth is, it really ticked me off at the time and I got defensive. So perhaps there is my answer! It also caused a chain reaction in my head. I started to believe that I wasn’t achieving enough (aka wasn’t good enough) on the fitness side of this journey. And I got down on myself.
Bottom line. Those negative thoughts get stopped in their tracks right now with this blog. I am NOT going negative, or getting whiny, or letting a little workout in the gym mess with my head or kick my butt. NOT happening! I am too strong, too stubborn, and frankly too far along in this journey for that. I am a fit girl and a strong girl and I am going to kick some ass – fitness and otherwise!
But I must take note of the emotion — the feelings of inadequacy that automatically came up. What is really going on for me? I know that the fitness part of the journey is critical to my short-term success – getting to goal. I also know it is critical to my long-term health and wellness. There is no question that I am committed to being someone who stays healthy and fit long after I reach my goal weight. And thus, there is no question that I am someone who will rock it in the gym on my own and push myself hard, with or without a trainer…for years to come.
If this journey has taught me one thing, it is to trust myself. Believe in myself. The strength is there…deep inside me. Sometimes that means pushing harder. And sometimes it means being gentle with myself and accepting that I am not perfect.
Can I be better about making each and every work out count, pushing myself harder in the gym and perfecting my form in strength training exercises? Absolutely. No question. No excuses.
At the same time, I am learning to live in a brand new body and I went from couch/office chair (with a fear of the gym) to working out nearly every day. Indeed, in one year, I have made incredible strides – in the fitness arena and in all facets of my life. I am not a weight lifter. I am not a ballarina. I am just me. And I have been working hard consistently to make huge gains both on the fitness and on the nutritional side.
So, while again, it is clear I am not perfect. And, there is room for improvement. I feel awesome and am proud of what I have accomplished. No shame or self loathing needed!
Indeed, I can kick it up a notch and dial into my muscle movements during weight training. I can also do a better job of learning the specific names and techniques of the exercises if that is what I need to do. And, I can do them on my own vs. with a trainer. Adjustments will be made.
However, I am choosing to believe I am a fit person on a journey and this is one step, perhaps one snag, along the way. I am learning new things about myself each day — both inside and outside – and I will take this information and make changes to my program to become a lean, mean fat burning machine (as coach Leif would say).
But, I won’t let it get me down…stop me in my tracks or, most importantly, make me feel inadequate. And I won’t make excuses. I am too strong, too healthy (inside and out) and stubborn for that. Ha! I love that about me.