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Posts tagged ‘patience’

Mar 26

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Setbacks. Learning to honor the struggle

This is not the blog I intended to write. I had every intention of writing about being consistently back in the gym and finally in a groove with my exercise routine. It turns out, the Universe had other plans.

After struggling to get in a regular winter exercise routine, and with the number on the scale moving in the wrong direction, I decided to take it back to the gym. The first couple of months were a challenge as my body was not used to being pushed that hard. But after a string of great workouts recently at Wilcox Wellness and Fitness,  things were starting to gel. I began to feel stronger and more capable.

The cool thing is that I know what comes next! The next phase includes me pushing myself even harder, feeling even more capable and stronger, and then actually starting to enjoy it, and finally craving it! Yes, I’ve been here before and I will be again. But I know you can’t get to that level without working through the more challenging phase one — which is where I have been.

It has taken months to move from my goal of getting back in the gym to get this extra weight off — to feeling like I was in a regular groove and could actually see strong and fit again! Finally, I was ready to claim progress, if not momentum.

Enter – setback. Read more

Oct 21

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Finding my strong on the mountaintop

Can you be strong when your world falls apart?

As I awoke to the morning sunlight streaming across the ocean and into the bedroom window, I was reminded that Hurricane Irma had just hit my life. Sadness set in before the sleep was out of my eyes. How can you be strong when it feels as if your whole world has just fallen apart? I’ve survived some tough stuff, but I’m not sure I know how to do so while being strong.

I got out of bed and made my way outside to the wrap-around porch to drink my morning coffee and watch the tide slowly roll out, exposing the sea life on the ocean floor. Will those critters survive this tidal change, I wondered? What do they do when they become exposed and are gasping for air?

As I sit rather zombie-like starring out at the sea, I feel sad, mad, worried, empty, scared, tired, overly emotional, and…more. Feelings too exhausting to think about. And yet I find myself preoccupied with one question — what does it look like to be strong when the world as you know it is changing forever and not by choice? When bad things and challenging times pummel you with gale-force speed like an unforgiving Hurricane batters the shore, and you can’t fix it or change it.

This is not the first time I’ve been pummeled, of course, but this feels like the worst pummeling ever. (Most of the details don’t matter to the story — we all have times we experience this). What strikes me today is that I don’t think I’ve ever pondered this question in the midst of a pummeling.

Rather, I’ve wallowed, cried, complained, and suffered alone in my hurt and pain — drowning it with work, food, alcohol — and hiding from the outside world. And when other people experienced pain and suffering — I was the first one to show up. I gave, and gave and gave at the expense of myself, trying to fix it.

None of this feels right to me now. None of it fits my new Lori-in-the-equation life. And yet the pull to go back to bed and bury my head in the covers is strong. The pull to eat everything in sight — even stronger! I have a lot of experience with that.

But perhaps this is the next evolution of transformation for me. An opportunity to find my strongest and best self and learn to cope with “hard,” while loving and giving to her. So, I get curious again.

Can you be strong when your world falls apart? Read more

Feb 17

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Staying in the equation when the going gets tough

The challenge & importance of self-care during times of emotional struggle, crisis & pain

ITE_restart_quoteMy beautiful sister (age 51) had a massive stroke last week. I was out of state for business and couldn’t do much to help from afar, except get home. The stress and family dynamics are tough. Emotions come and go, but mostly flood in as we each in our own way try to let reality set in.

Last night, I ate an entire pizza and a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. This, of course, was not on my healthy-living, Lori-in-the-equation plan. However, just like old times, I used food to cope with my emotions and then felt guilt over it.

Today, I RESTART! Read more

Feb 11

Love. It starts with you.

Tips for beginning to walk toward self-love and acceptance

self-loveSomewhere along my path of personal transformation, I’ve found a self-love and acceptance that brings me peace, joy and a centeredness that grounds me every day. I now love and accept myself exactly as I am — imperfections and all. For real. And that means I am more patient and kind to myself, more forgiving and gentle. And I’ve opened myself up to all kinds of other amazing love as a result.

The coolest part of this is that I’ve traveled here from almost the exact opposite end of the spectrum. From a place of almost unconscious, undetected struggle inside to ever be good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, strong enough, sexy enough…

Yep, I came from a place that often allowed self-loathing to this amazing new place where I have a deep sense of self-respect, self-care and self-love. There’s a new, stronger and beautiful voice inside me that is able to counter and drown out (most of the time) my inner critic.

This was NOT an easy thing! It was not a one-time event. I can’t even tell you exactly when or how it happened for me. I just know that along the way of my external transformation to lose 200+ lbs, all the while working internally on recognizing, quieting and then changing my internal voice, I literally found myself. My beautiful, amazing, resilient and loving self! Read more

Sep 2

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Her secret is patience

It’s been one week since my first half marathon and I am in a very different place today than I was a week ago. Last Sunday I was on an emotional and physical high after completing the Women’s Half Marathon in Bloomington. I was feeling strong and fit, and planning future races. My body didn’t ache like I expected. While there was some minor muscle fatigue, I felt great and was back race walking and strength training three days post marathon…and grinning from ear to ear. Read more

Mar 20

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Patience is key…trusting myself and the process

It has been many months since I’ve written here and, to be honest, I wasn’t sure I would restart this blog at all. I promised myself I would only write if I had something to say that I felt would be of use to both me and the very few of you who read this! Today, I decided to write…for me. Read more

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