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Posts tagged ‘brene brown’

Setbacks. Learning to honor the struggle

This is not the blog I intended to write. I had every intention of writing about being consistently back in the gym and finally in a groove with my exercise routine. It turns out, the Universe had other plans.

After struggling to get in a regular winter exercise routine, and with the number on the scale moving in the wrong direction, I decided to take it back to the gym. The first couple of months were a challenge as my body was not used to being pushed that hard. But after a string of great workouts recently at Wilcox Wellness and Fitness,  things were starting to gel. I began to feel stronger and more capable.

The cool thing is that I know what comes next! The next phase includes me pushing myself even harder, feeling even more capable and stronger, and then actually starting to enjoy it, and finally craving it! Yes, I’ve been here before and I will be again. But I know you can’t get to that level without working through the more challenging phase one — which is where I have been.

It has taken months to move from my goal of getting back in the gym to get this extra weight off — to feeling like I was in a regular groove and could actually see strong and fit again! Finally, I was ready to claim progress, if not momentum.

Enter – setback. Read more

So you’re not perfect. It’s okay. Perfect isn’t cool!

Ever hold yourself to a standard of perfection, only to find that it kept you stuck, stalled & living in a state of constant worry? Good News: Perfect isn’t cool! And striving for it can actually be a form of self-sabotage.

Last week I was on vacation with one of my “besties” in sunny 80-degree Florida! It was a planned birthday trip, combined with a respite from winter in Maine, and a much needed soul recharge to visit a close friend.

The Tampa weather was warm and sunny and it felt amazing to be walking outside every day. I walked 2-4 miles most mornings for outdoor cardio and we walked the beaches as much as possible. Truthfully, I couldn’t get enough! We ate healthy, too. My friend, Mary, is a dietician and an amazing cook who makes the best salads! Plus, I was on a personal mission to eat grilled Gulf shrimp and Grouper as often as I could.

The combination of eating healthy on vacation and moving outside in the sunshine every day totally lifted my spirits. Not to mention, the added psychological benefit of laughing and spending quality time with one of my closest friends. I came home focused and re-energized. Just the way it should be after vacation. Right?!

Reality set in when I returned to a very windy and cold Maine, and resumed the task of making a new life where I have yet to establish a solid routine. Transitions are hard for me in general, but I know this and was determined to continue my momentum upon returning home.

Fast forward a few days and, well, I am struggling. So what happened?

Well, life! Nothing too crazy, just normal stuff. Can you relate? Read more

Tomorrow starts today!

Need help with Mindset, Motivation & Momentum?
Join me on Instagram now AND in person on Nov. 12!

Ok peeps, today is the day. Not tomorrow, not the next day, or even next Monday. Nope, it’s today!

Today is as good a day as any to begin…to get yourself back on track…to stop making excuses…to stop whining about how hard it is or listing all the reasons you can’t. It’s time to start, restart…just do it!

Are you with me?

Today’s blog is part confession and part invitation. Let’s get real, and be honest with ourselves and each other. I need a restart too! Together, let’s STOP making excuses, STOP self-sabotaging, STOP whining about all the reasons it’s hard…and just START. This is your wake up call and your invitation…and mine!

If you find yourself in need of inspiration, motivation, accountability, support, or perhaps in need of a massive mindset shift — and trust me, it’s all about mindset — join me.
Read more

Finding my strong on the mountaintop

Can you be strong when your world falls apart?

As I awoke to the morning sunlight streaming across the ocean and into the bedroom window, I was reminded that Hurricane Irma had just hit my life. Sadness set in before the sleep was out of my eyes. How can you be strong when it feels as if your whole world has just fallen apart? I’ve survived some tough stuff, but I’m not sure I know how to do so while being strong.

I got out of bed and made my way outside to the wrap-around porch to drink my morning coffee and watch the tide slowly roll out, exposing the sea life on the ocean floor. Will those critters survive this tidal change, I wondered? What do they do when they become exposed and are gasping for air?

As I sit rather zombie-like starring out at the sea, I feel sad, mad, worried, empty, scared, tired, overly emotional, and…more. Feelings too exhausting to think about. And yet I find myself preoccupied with one question — what does it look like to be strong when the world as you know it is changing forever and not by choice? When bad things and challenging times pummel you with gale-force speed like an unforgiving Hurricane batters the shore, and you can’t fix it or change it.

This is not the first time I’ve been pummeled, of course, but this feels like the worst pummeling ever. (Most of the details don’t matter to the story — we all have times we experience this). What strikes me today is that I don’t think I’ve ever pondered this question in the midst of a pummeling.

Rather, I’ve wallowed, cried, complained, and suffered alone in my hurt and pain — drowning it with work, food, alcohol — and hiding from the outside world. And when other people experienced pain and suffering — I was the first one to show up. I gave, and gave and gave at the expense of myself, trying to fix it.

None of this feels right to me now. None of it fits my new Lori-in-the-equation life. And yet the pull to go back to bed and bury my head in the covers is strong. The pull to eat everything in sight — even stronger! I have a lot of experience with that.

But perhaps this is the next evolution of transformation for me. An opportunity to find my strongest and best self and learn to cope with “hard,” while loving and giving to her. So, I get curious again.

Can you be strong when your world falls apart? Read more

Faith, courage & love

Requirements for braving the wilderness & living healthy, happy & whole

There is no other blog I could write today. I had the privilege of being in the audience last night at United Methodist Church in Minneapolis, MN, as the amazing Brene Brown kicked off her book tour for Braving the Wilderness, The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone.

Those of you who frequent this blog, know that I’ve not only been inspired by Brene Brown’s work around courage, vulnerability, love, belonging, shame and empathy, but her best-selling books have mirrored my growth AND my personal understanding about my transformation journey. In her message, I am blessed to learn, grow and evolve as a wholehearted human being, and now to share that experience and perhaps help others in doing so.

The values that Brene Brown speaks about — faith and courage — I share. I try to live daily by the core values of faith, courage and love — and it has perhaps never been more challenging than right now. Read more

Does every cloud have a silver lining?

Reflections on a tough year and impending holiday. Not the blog I wanted or expected to write.

“Every cloud has a silver lining.” What does that mean, I wondered as a friend said those words in an attempt to comfort my heavy heart? Where did that phrase come from? While I get the spirit of it — there’s a bright side to every situation — it made me wonder if I really believed it.

Sometimes it feels impossible to imagine that even the worst situations have some positive aspect — especially when you are in the throws of it. Like when  your heart is heavy and your spirit broken. When things seem so bleak that you can’t find your way out. When you’re in physical and/or emotional pain that feels unbearable. When it seems as if the world is swirling out of control around you. Or, when something bad has happened to someone (or a whole bunch of someones) you love, and you can’t fix it.

And when this happens at the holidays, it feels even worse because there is so much anticipation and expectation around this time of year. For me, and many that I love, this is how we are feeling as we enter the holidays of 2016.

Yet as I process through it in writing this blog, I  realize that as incredibly tough as this past year and the impending holidays seem right now, I have not lost heart or hope. I just feel sad. My heart is heavy.

(Stick with me, it gets better, I promise!) Read more

Maybe what matters most is being brave

EDITOR’S NOTE: This blog is dedicated to the beautifully brave women in my life who have reminded me recently how awesome it is to both EXPERIENCE and WITNESS courage in action. Whether it’s facing a life-changing medical crisis and remaining strong and brave in the face of uncertainty, like my sister Lisa and my cousin, Donna. Or the beautiful and brave women who leapt despite their fear to put themselves and their health and happiness first as they embark on their own In-the-Equation journeys. To all the beautiful and brave women I know — this one’s for you. #brave #bravegirls #onebravething

lori-bravequote1When I was in the physical part of my personal transformation journey — nearing my weight-loss goal — someone asked me what the tipping point was for me. How did I find success this time when I had tried and failed so many other times?

To be honest, I don’t remember my exact answer. But I remember thinking later that I needed to know the real answer for myself. So I kept asking myself — what WAS different this time? How DID I do it?

A few days later, I noodled on a napkin the words: “Everything changed when I learned I could be brave and afraid at the exact same moment.” I lost 200 lbs and made my health, happiness and life a priority, the day I was brave and afraid at the same time…and acted anyway.

It was both the act of deciding and taking action that was brave. And little did I know at the time, but life with Lori-in-the-equation would require living a brave life — every day.

Too often we let fear stop us. The fear of putting ourselves out there, the fear of what others will think, fear of failure, fear of the unknown, even fear of success, can stop us dead in our tracks. When fear stops us, we play it safe. We retract and don’t go for what we really, really want. Often we stay stuck or living small. We don’t let ourselves truly shine. And for many of us, it means we don’t reach our personal and greatest potential. Can you relate?

There is another way. The brave life. Read more

A pain in the butt!

What my body is teaching me

yourbody-rohnWhat started as a serious pain in the butt in early July — waking me at 4:30 a.m. out of a dead sleep — soon developed into full-blown sciatica.

I’ve now been struggling with lower back and leg pain for nine weeks, and at least four of those included chronic nerve pain, with little or no relief.

In mid August, the nerve pain shifted/traveled. Finally, it got so bad that I was grounded from my daily walking routine. This made matters worse because I lost my one healthy outlet for relieving the stress and keeping it together.

That was about the time I lost it. Read more

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