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Posts tagged ‘Fear’

Confession of a healthy and fit girl

lori-readytoroll-firstbikeoutingI have a confession to make. I’m 53 years old, and this week I took my first bike ride in nearly 35 years! (Think bicycle not Harley.)

This is a milestone I have to document. And in doing so, I hope to provide hope and inspiration to others who have given up exercise or personal enjoyment because they are too out of shape or afraid of what others might think. I can’t believe it’s taken me 30 years, four years sans -200 lbs, to get on a bicycle again.

How many things do we give up when we become overweight, sedentary, too busy, too focused on others, too afraid? Or, because we don’t think we deserve them. The answer for me was — A LOT!

Over the years of my adulthood as I became heavier and heavier, I started hiding myself behind that weight and the fear of putting myself out there. Slowly but surely, I limited my life and it became small.

Some examples. I gave up dating and romantic relationships — taking myself “off the market” and “turning the porch light off” because I was deathly afraid of rejection. I never traveled oversees or to places like Hawaii or Alaska, because I didn’t want to be on an airplane so long that I might have to use the restroom — I didn’t fit and flying wasn’t a fun experience. It was uncomfortable and I lived in fear of the seat belt not buckling and the flight attendants discovering that and offering me an extension.

Eventually, I gave up a lot of the outdoor activities I used to enjoy — walks on the beach or in the woods, jogging up hills, playing softball, riding a bike. That last one was a killer because growing up in rural Minnesota, I LOVED to ride bike! Read more

In the Equation Coaching now available

Need help to put yourself in the equation & live the healthy, well life you desire & deserve? Our second coaching group program kicks off next January!

Lori-HappyFallWhat better day to announce the next chapter of my In the Equation work than on #MotivationMonday. Starting this Fall, I’m offering In the Equation life and transformation coaching.

During the past eight months, I’ve been trained as a health and wellness coach and developed an innovative transformative weight loss & wellness coaching program for those who want to change their lives and live WHOLE, healthy and happy — like me!

It’s been four years since I reached my goal weight and have maintained a -200 lb weight loss and healthy, in-the-equation lifestyle. During that time, I’ve been blogging and sharing my transformation story and principles for losing the weight and living well. And the most frequently asked questions I get: “How did you do it?” And, “Can I get help like you did to lose the weight and get my life back?”

Well, the answer to the last question is YES! The how and the help and support now come in the form of hands-on coaching offered by me — someone whose been there and done that and shares the ongoing journey of transformation every day.

Today at In the Equation, we’re announcing three exciting (pilot) coaching programs. Read more

Opening yourself up

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This blog is for anyone who is sitting in a place of hope, uncertainty, possibility, or even overwhelm. Anyone feeling stuck or immobilized. Anyone brave enough to ask: What if? And: What next?

That’s where I am today.

I write from the National Wellness Institute’s Annual Conference — one of the most stimulating, enlightening, and instructive conferences I’ve attended in a long time. The National Wellness Conference brings wellness leaders, professionals and experts together from all over the country. People who are in a health and wellness, helping people, making the world a better place profession. Read more

Courageous Girl: Four years ago I was scared to death…

…and I had the courage to begin my transformation journey.

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Lori_Before

BEFORE: This is me at the start of weight loss boot camp.

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AFTER: This is me in my makeover photo shoot after reaching goal in May 2012.

Four years ago today, I found myself at a live-in, weight-loss boot camp at my beloved resort on Lake Superior — beginning a journey that would change the trajectory of my life forever.

I had no idea at the time just how much this one decision would matter, or what it meant in the grand scheme of my life. Nor did I have a clue how much courage I would have to muster. There simply was no way to prepare my mind and body for what I was about to put it through. Nor was there a way to ease my intense fear.

And so, with a pit in my stomach the size of California, I leapt off the cliff. I adopted a “just do it” mentality and trusted that I would survive the boot camp and be stronger for it. I trusted that my business would be okay in the hands of others for those two weeks and that my clients would understand. And, I trusted my mentor and inspiration, O’Neal Hampton, when he said “We’ve got this. You can be happy.”

I trusted in these things because at 381 pounds I felt I had no choice. I weighed more than an NFL Defensive Lineman (the biggest player on the football team) and was living a small and limiting life. Although I was successful in my career, I had given up on love, had a limited social life because I couldn’t do so many things at my size. And, I was secretly hiding behind the shame that I had let my body and my life come to this and I couldn’t seem to fix it.

To mask the internal pain, I stuffed my feelings with gallons of fast and processed foods, and worked 12 to 18 hours a day, seven days a week, in an office chair. This was not a path to a happy and fulfilling life. Rather, it was a quick road to an early death since stroke, diabetes and heart disease all run rampant in my family. I was out of the equation of my own life, not even in the picture at all. And, I was out of options.

Courageous Girl

It takes immense courage to change your life when you’ve lost hope. But I did it. I swallowed hard, packed my bags, handed off the reigns of my marketing business, and ventured to Minnesota’s North Shore for weight-loss boot camp. Taking one moment, one hour at a time, I repeated to myself over and over what O’Neal had said to me: “We’ve got this. You can do this.”

I showed up on day one of the two-week boot camp and in that first meeting with the program director set this goal for myself: “I will NOT quit. No matter what!” That goal has been my mantra since that very day four years ago. Yep, it was not just my goal in boot camp, but my new mantra in life, especially when the going gets tough. And it has served me well.

Most people set weight loss goals at the beginning of the boot camp. But I knew that, for me, it would be tough to stay in the game and not throw in the towel when the going got really, really tough. To keep fighting and pushing forward through intense physical and emotional pain would be my biggest victory. I knew that if I found the courage to do that, the weight loss would follow.

I was right.

I went on to lose -211pounds, nearly 50% body fat, and 11 dress sizes. It took me 18-months from that day to lose the weight and achieve a body fat of 14.5%. I’ve now maintained my weight loss for 2.5 years, with a few ups and downs. That was the physical transformation. But it was the internal transformation that was most profound and that many of you have heard me speak and write about. The internal happiness that comes from learning self-love and acceptance, and really believing that you are enough. This is the gift that leaves one nearly speechless. And the gift that truly keeps on giving, and giving and giving.

Taking stock of the journey & reaping the rewards…one anniversary at a time

Each year on the anniversary of my official transformation start (Nov. 28-Dec. 11, 2010) and again on the anniversary of reaching my goal weight (May 12, 2012), I blog about the impact on my life. I write about what the transformation anniversary means to me and how my life is different as a result. And, each year, I hope to reach others with my message: Each and every person deserves to be happy, can be happy, and has within them the power to make it happen. I am a living example. If I can do it, you can do it.

This year, I’ve decided to take stock in a slightly more formal way. I’ve set a goal to write something every day in my personal journal and/or here about the transformation as I’m experiencing it today. It’s strange but I have found that the farther I get into the journey of healthy living, the more profound the transformation for me.

The internal transformation continues, and the learning and growth are more palpable with each passing month and year. The external transformation — learning to live a healthy lifestyle and keep the weight off (which for me means battling addiction and changing life-long patterns and behaviors) — becomes more real. I thought it would get easier with time but the truth is, it ebbs and flows, like life. It is definitely an ongoing challenge and a process.

Proud, happy and grateful

So, today, on the four-year anniversary of my life-changing transformation start, I feel intensely proud of my courage and eternally grateful for the process AND the results.

I am grateful for the life-changing gift of health and happiness. I am grateful for my new life, even with its twisty ups and downs. I am grateful for O’Neal Hampton, my inspiration and mentor in the boot camp process. And, for my coaches and trainers who’ve helped me along the way. I am grateful for Sue, Shari and Carrie who supported me in those incredibly challenging boot camp days, and in many days since.

I am overwhelmed with gratitude for all of my family, friends and supporters — old and new — who continue to encourage, cheer, listen and support me now, four years later.

Finally, I hold tremendous gratitude in my heart that I am strong enough, brave enough, beautiful enough, sexy enough, wise enough, courageous enough to follow my heart and go for my big, hairy, audacious goals and dreams — wherever they may take me.

Thank you for reading this blog. For being here as part of the In the Equation community. And for being courageous enough to follow your dreams and go for your big, hairy, audacious goals!

XO

Lori

#courageousgirl #beyondgrateful #happyhealthygirl

Read related blogs here, including a few from my boot camp experience four years ago:

You are exactly where you need to be

Day 1: 7 hours and still going strong

Climbed a mountain and then some

Oberg Mountain — my new personal quest

My Fitness North 2 Finale

Before & After Pics, Video

Celebrating one year in a little black dress

One year sans 200 pounds…my new reality

Two years fit and healthy

Three years — another cool milestone

Step forward toward your goals

From the unknown, to familiar, to conquered, to what’s next?!

My Bud

Bud, my walking partner ready to roll!

As I was walking the Blue Hill Loop last week with my beloved, Bud, it occurred to me that the first time I walked this 2.5 mile loop, it felt far more difficult and I wasn’t certain I’d make it. It was new and unfamiliar territory and surprisingly up hill. Randy was walking at an incredibly fast clip and there were times I was struggling to keep up. (And, I was the one who was supposed to be in shape!).

I remember asking several times how much farther we had to go. I didn’t know where I was, how far into the journey, or how to get home. The uncertainty was nagging at me.

When my Mom visited in July, we walked the Loop and she reacted the same way that I did that first time. It felt challenging and she kept asking how much farther and if there was a short cut. (To my Mom’s credit, she is in her 70’s and was brave enough to tackle the walk!)

I can’t help wonder if sometimes the fear of the unknown stops us short of taking on new things…of really going for our big, hairy, audacious goals — or even doing little things because they are unfamiliar. We worry they might be difficult, we might not succeed, and the outcome is uncertain. Read more

No more I can’t – only yes I can!

This morning my trainer Sandra said to me during a post workout stretch exercise: “Every time someone tells you that you might not be able to do something, you do it. You prove them wrong.”

We laughed about how incredibly stubborn and driven I am. But the truth is, I love that about me. And this was definitely not always the case. Read more

Fear…a showstopper? NOT!

Fear…

It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power. ~ Alan Cohen

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Read more

Goals and dreams…dreams and goals

As I ready for the journey ahead, there is a lot of anticipation, some fear, and a little worry about getting the work wrapped up and letting go of the business. Then there are some dreams that sneak in admist the anticipation and worry. I think about what success might look like, feel like, and how my life would change! My trainer Julie asked me if I had thought about goals and the reward. Tonight as I am trying desparetly to finish a big plan, I let myself go there. Read more