I did everything right & things didn’t go my way
Damn, I hate it when that happens! Is there anything tougher?
The truth is, it doesn’t get much tougher to stay on course when you do everything right and things don’t work out.
On May 12, the second anniversary of maintaining my weight loss, I wrote about getting off track and battling hormonal hell (aka perimenopause) — Two years fit & healthy. New life…new lessons. I was struggling to stay on my personal health and wellness plan and decided to “restart” and “refocus” — as I have a hundred times in the last two years.
So, I issued the “In Your Equation Spring Challenge” and invited others to join me in setting specific goals for their overall health and wellness, and to stick with it until May 30, 2014. (Read more about the In Your Equation Spring Challenge here.)
Well, I’ve learned something very important this time around: Sometimes you do everything right and the results still don’t go your way, and they certainly don’t match your effort. To put it mildly, WOW, is it hard to stay on course, not get discouraged (and/or pissed), and not throw in the towel when that happens.
It has taken everything I’ve got this time to stay the course when things aren’t going my way, believing that they will some day and knowing the alternative is far worse. But I am a bit crabby about it. And, I’m right there with those of you who get discouraged and want to quit when the going gets tough.
But at the beginning of my transformation journey, and the beginning of this Spring 2014 Challenge, I made myself ONE promise from which I am proud to say I have never waivered — NO MATTER WHAT, I WILL NOT QUIT!!!
Here’s my story of the past week during Spring Challenge 2014
My personal challenge goals were: to get back on track with my clean eating, up the ante on exercise, get enough sleep every day, get back to a gallon of water a day, cut out alcohol and reduce caffeine, and sign up for a 5 or 10K race this June. And, most importantly, to do this consistently for the 2+ weeks of the In Your Equation Spring Challenge.
Well, my program has been going great. And, unlike all of the other times that I’ve restarted and been 100% on track, this time I haven’t dropped a pound! Yep, I am totally stalled out on the scale. I am 99% sure this is hormonal, and after discussing it with my doctor, she assures me it is common for women going through perimenopause. And, she insists it will eventually pass and the weight will come down again. But, hey, tell that to me when I am on a diet and working my butt off and the results aren’t there. Tell that to me when I am moody and not sleeping — not for lack of trying. Not a happy camper. (And who invented this perimenopause thing anyway, it’s crap! 🙂 )
Okay, rant over. Time to regroup. The truth is, this happened to me (in a milder version) one time during the end of my weight loss journey. I remember calling my coach Leif Anderson in tears scared as hell that this would stall me out forever and I would never lose another pound. (Of course, most women reading this know that the tears and mood swings — yep, that’s all part of it, too, making me/us feel a bit crazy!)
So, for a week of this Challenge, where I am giving it 100+% and am as focused and determined as ever, the scale is not moving for me. Truth be told, I’m not feeling much better or different either. And, yes, I am frustrated and crabby about it, for sure!
Here we are again, perhaps the toughest and greatest lesson for me: To learn to let go of things I can’t control, and, to stay the course even and especially when there is no positive reinforcement and the going is tough. Okay, two lessons. How many of you have been in this place? Wow, this is a tough lesson. It’s that old – head and heart thing at play too.
It would be so easy for me to give up and throw in the towel. I have good reason. No one would blame me. Believe me, I have wanted to quit about 100x times past week. But aside from a couple of human imperfections yesterday when I hosted my family for an outdoor BBQ, I have been perfectly on plan. I have stayed the course and kept moving forward. Taking it one day at a time.
Instead of throwing in the towel and using this as an excuse to quit. I am:
- Working actively, every day, on giving up control and trusting that if I walk the path I know, it will work out and I will lose some weight and feel better – eventually.
- Being open and curious about everything around me so I can learn from this and grow stronger on the inside. (A blog about this “curious” factor and how it is serving me well coming soon.)
- And, I have ramped up my gratitude practice so that every day as I work out and walk around my lake, I spend the ENTIRE time focused on all of the things I am grateful for. This is a pretty cool exercise if you haven’t tried it.
So far so good, this plan is working. But it is not easy. I am crabbier than I have been in awhile. Yet, I’m more determined than ever. I still see the beauty in learning and growing in my journey of wholeness – every single day. And that is the gift.
You know that saying, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” This is me. This is how I want to be remembered. I am tough, and I am learning every day how to give up control of the things I can’t control and let nature run its course.
Now, how are you all doing?
Those of you joining me in the Challenge and those who are not. Let me know either in private message or by posting here or in our Put Yourself in the Equation Facebook group. Friend me on Facebook if you are not a member and want to join.
It’s never too late to put yourself in the equation and refocus. And no matter the outcome, I find, there is always learning, growth and results. Sometimes they are just different than what you imagine. A lesson I keep learning.
Cheers. Happy week two Challenge peeps!
P.S. Thank you Randy for not giving up on me during this crazy time and for helping me to see the humor in it all. 😉